twitter

ps. i joined twitter a few days ago (prefaced with the rationale that i am a hip web developer and have to keep on the up and ups of technology). i like it. we'll see how long that lasts, but for now i've added a little twitter thing to the side of the blog so you can stay 'hyper-connected' to me and know what i'm doing all of the time. creepy and oddly enjoyable.

so far major themes seem to be coding, eating, and looking out the window. sounds about right.

robin

a big fat robin has puffed up it's red breast, i'm guessing as a response to the chill in the air the past few days, and is pruning on the railing of the back porch beside my office. i like that i can sit here and work, glance to my right through the patio door, and see such a small and lovely bit of nature.

i've been writing less here than am willing and able to. might be because i program all day and to spend extra time in front of the computer for non-work stuff has become less attractive. in the city, sitting here gave me peace and calm, a respite from the busy streets. but now that the world outside has become... peaceful and calm, it no longer serves that great purpose and i'm instead a little anxious to finish my hours for the day and do something else. not even anything grand - the dishes, repotting tomato seedlings, petting the dog. i imagine more will come with time like recording songs, writing, making little films... tho darn, those are all in front of the computer too!

the robin flew away for awhile, mid-post, but now he's back, puffing and pruning. i want to name him. is big red too unoriginal?

blogs i like

gillian over at hit pay dirt was sweet enough to give me a giant E image award for excellent blog. so nice. i think it's one of those pass-it-on things so i'd like to note, other than gill, i love reading mike's tiny farm blog, milla's hilarious country lite, and elizabeth's pensive welsh hills again (and perez hilton but let's leave that one out). i'd also like to link to my girl jp, over at vine in a cold climate. d & i live here with her & her black lab in her beautiful house. she brought me coffee this morning.

postpone

programming so much it tires me
tired so much it makes me stay
home with movies and tea
but muscles are aching to leave

a run, a walk, a bike ride
anything for a heart beat and sweat
soon, till then
the odd back porch visit

city girl

on the green side of the drive it is open windows and laughter. but once things close up on the road, so does my chest. like a scared dog i gnash teeth and claw, the grey skies clouding my vision and awareness, negativity leaking into my blood where once there was fresh oxygen. finally, avoiding death, we park, but the aftermath of vehicular stress is already deep in my marrow.

shaking on the streets, there is luckily refuge above, twelve stories, in the home of a friend who is away. i storm there, growling at anyone who looks at me, especially the men and the crazies. for i am crazy myself with anger toward the existence of such a place.

then, a knapsack off my back, a big breath, a quiet room.

and the realisation that in only two short weeks i've transformed back into a country mouse, further proof that most likely i always was, despite a decade of trying otherwise.

in trinity bellwoods park, my love, now reconciled, reminds me i live away from here and that this is only a visit. with a kiss, a roti, and a rock show i'm relatively revived. by morning, again willing and walking the streets. early morning streetcar, knee socks, muffin from the cafe... it ain't so bad.

and by mid afternoon, returning from a quick and easy jaw appointment (TMJ gone), sashaying, wanting to sing aloud. for i am young, free, and visiting a great and beautiful city! expensive meals, pleasantries with strangers, heck, a massage appointment for friday at a shmancy yorkville spa (insurance covered of course). this is good, yeah, this is alright.