Sunday, December 14, 2008

the roads we take

An easy Sunday morning... pets fed, fire rekindled, bathroom cleaned, breakfast eaten, dishes soaking, shower pending, and right now just catching up on some work. Preparing for a small meeting tomorrow in the city, then Whisk will need a walk (tho we bought the petsafe in-ground fence stuff yesterday, so soon he will be running again! without phone calls from unhappy neighbour! we hope!), and I'll have to pack a bag, then drive to the commuter train station about 1.5hrs away, then another 45min trip into the city, then a streetcar to band practice at 7pm... wew! Days like this are strange and great to me - one minute, I'm walking along a deserted, unplowed country road with my dog, the next I'm chatting with strangers on Queen St., en route to playing loud guitar and screaming with band-mates. It's a dual existence and it's so cool to get to live both.

What's a winter post without a weather update? Earlier this week, temperatures were in the -20's and now it's mild and heading for +7! On top of lots and lots and LOTS of precipitation... snow, rain, sleet, it makes for crazy driving conditions. Am hoping the snow let's up so that D gets home safe and I can make it to the big smoke tonight. Full on snow-storm right now so we'll see.

D's snowman from a couple weeks ago... and now we have even more snow!

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

kong

All hail the kong ball! D picked it up last night at the pet store, taking a queue from JP and her Per. Keeps a dog busy long enough to relieve pet owner guilt over the little guy's boredom. Put a bit of peanut butter in there and he's happy as a clam, for hours. Tho I just heard a loud sigh from the living room. Think he's taking a frustrated breather.

Yet another huge snowstorm. It's crazy! Need to get some x-country skiis ASAP.

Monday, December 08, 2008

in winter

Snowed in and cozy. Alone with the domesticated animal kingdom inside, and the rest out in the dark. Wind that can make you sit up and wonder, but know it's just the wind. Because no one would come this way, in this weather, at this time of night, with only a moonlit sky to guide them. Finishing the dark, cold, candle-lit adventure of Neverwhere feels appropriate and satisfying (good read!). A new quilt on the bed for the night's big chill.

The morning's sun glitters in the fields like diamonds, which cover my eyelashes when walking up the road with trusty canine sidekick, -20C no thang. No neighbours or neighbours' pets out. Just us. I shovel a little spot for D's car, coming home now that highway 26 reopened. Happy to resume conversation and company with fellow human, especially such a good one. Toronto plans delayed until it makes healthy sense to drive, perhaps Wed night, as we're due for another storm tonight and tomorrow. Yes, I see it's already begun!

Friday, November 28, 2008

flurries take two

There just aren't enough hours in the days, not enough days in the months, not enough months in the years. But funnily enough, what makes all these moments feel meaningful and acknowledged is... stillness. Something I read a lot about but rarely practice. Need to change that soon cos I feel so much richness in my life, but seldom take the time to fully experience it. All of a sudden I'll be another year older, spending too much of it with a mind busy with silly stuff, forgetting to really live in the moment.

Just taking a minute now to look out the window. So much energy and beauty in today's intense snow storm. Thank the sky our snowblower comes back from the shop tomorrow. My car's totally snowed in!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

walks

Have started getting Whisk to take me for walks. Our road is quiet and beautiful so we just go to the rich people's place and back, up the road a ways. For some reason the ditch across from their farm is his choice bathroom stop and that amuses me a little. Sometimes neighbour C, an older happy chatty chap, is out and we gossip a little about the other neighbours and trade our own personal tid-bits of info. I like it so much he's made my Christmas card list.

With 'Cedar Tree' road not too far away, it's no surprise that our road is lined with... cedars. Thick, dense hedges that, when walking alone in silence, feel large and haunting but in a protective way. You can sense that despite the quiets, there is a lot going on in the depths, little rabbit and mouse tracks criss-crossing the snow beneath the trees. It is the same sensation of unknown savage activity that has kept us from exploring our own bush (about 50 acres) tho now that the bears are sleeping, am feeling more brave. Our last attempt at walking the trail along the north side was thwarted by steaming piles of bear poop. Despite walking with our friends and two dogs, we took it as a reasonable warning. The thought of getting cut off along the trail behind us by a large black beast was too spooky to ignore so we headed back right away.

Another nice walk is the Victoria rail trail in Fenelon. D and I (and the dawg of course) walked an hour or more on it last Sunday morning. It's a cushy hike, meeting many a post-church-walking senior, but you get to ogle the huge lovely cottages that line the trail and Cameron lake. We saw a Shih Tzu in an army jacket and three ATVs. Then we were both like, "we need some ATVs!"

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

flurries

Ain't he cute? Our little sunshine. Snow snow snow and subzero temps this week - I guess a second big melt is beyond us now. Darn, there are a few yard chores yet to do that would be easier without it. But it's really beautiful! And sort of exciting. A new season, a new adventure. Have started the 3am stoking of the fire so the house isn't ice when we wake at 6.30. Learning that each place has a rhythm that you figure out over time, for it to run smoothly, happily (& warmly) with whomever lives in it.

In these indoory times, have been turning inwards toward the comforts of home & self. Good food, baths, wine, sitting on the couch by the fire, making up dialogue for the pets, HBO television on dvd, etc.


It's a good life... a great life! Tho I feel a little spoiled. The off-grid time (i.e. not really participating in society) is stirring in me a desire to do something more... meaningful. I feel like we'll get there, producing something or offering something that will be beneficial to those around us, so for now just keeping that in mind as we brainstorm all the different ways our little farm could evolve.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

meditation

Today is thoroughly about the slow pace. Woken up by the nose of a yellow lab, staying warm under covers while my love makes coffee, watching the sky change from pink to orange to blue out new windows, getting up to get the fire going again, reading the big Saturday newspaper, making hummus... that kinda day. Right now I'm on the couch with Whiskey lying at the end (nice leg rest), Moe's over on the chair. Belly full, fire going, sweat shirt and leggings, etc. D's visiting his folks till Tuesday so I'm enjoying a quiet quiet night. Just the fan of the fireplace really, and this.

We didn't realise the Dharma Centre was just around the corner till after moving here. D drives by it all the time now as it's close to his work. Looking at their retreats online, I see there are a lot of very cool opportunities but with steepish price tags. So for now, a reminder of the richness of meditation... and perhaps a weekend to save for ;)

Tho a whole place dedicated to the experience just up the road - why not here too, for free? Mindfulness practice was a life-saver years back but since feeling well again, has been put on the shelf. And everyday since stopping, I've missed it. So tonight, in the quiets, I sat on the rug by the fire, crossed my legs, straightened my back, and breathed. sooooooooooooo... huuuummmmmmmmm... sooooooooooooo... huuummmmmmmmmmmmm... Not ten breaths in, there is a small prickle at the ends of my fingers. Attacked by the claws of a small beast, my hands are pawed into action - scooping her up and placing little Moe in my lap, I can't help but smile. The interruptions of my country life are really little meditations themselves.

Saturday, November 08, 2008

scentses

Buttery organic coffee with a dash of JP's irish cream. Rosemary taters. Wood piling, musty and spiced, like the hot smokey fires to come. Sweat and grass with a late afternoon rain. Wet dawg.

Cinnamon, nutmeg, and freshly ground cloves: acorn squash muffins just out of the oven (thanks bro for giving me so many I had to search for a use. Squash muffins are delicious! Who knew?). D and I have already downed two each. Swallowed down with a creamy vanilla coconut chardonnay, and he with a bottle of 50.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

winter prep

Beautiful days this last week. We had rushed to put the garlic in after the last dump of snow (Oct 21), and now it's like spring out there. Still, good to have it in and happy in these nice temperatures. Nice to get something in the ground as we missed this summer's garden season (moved here in July). Planted 6 pounds of music and german red... around 250 cloves! Anyone want garlic next summer?
Four cord of wood coming today - we'll be piling all weekend, with the help of my wonderful brother who's back from Alberta. Most of it on the porch and the rest along the fence facing the porch. That will be above our septic bed but I figure since it will be used up by the end of the winter, we won't have to worry about moisture/weight too much. Our spring order should probably go elsewhere. La la la.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

things we do

A small thermos of coffee, curious cat, sleeping dog, CBC classical, incense, warm sweater/socks, and a list of special and important things to do with my time between waking and starting work at 9am: music, reading, writing, exercise, planning. Things creative and enriching to feel purposeful and balanced and well. Alas, there's never enough time. Hoping the self-discipline to curb wanderings into time-wasters (day-dreaming, celebrity gossip websites, amazon book browsing, fetching snacks...) will develop as my frustration with lack of productivity grows.

Speaking of productivity, D took some pics at one of his job sites where they're building a post and beam "porch" (ah, rich folk) that I think is just so beautiful and incredible. He comes home completely exhausted from a day of carpentry but it must be so satisfying to have something like this be the fruit of your days' labours.
As a software developer, it's sometimes hard to appreciate the intangible outcome of my work. Tho the project I'm on should produce something totally cool and (hopefully) well-used, I find myself drawn more toward a life of things sensual: cooking, baking, gardening, sewing, herbalism, yoga, building things... and all there is to learn, experience, become skillful at within each.

Friday, October 17, 2008

end of the day

Beautiful weekend ahead even if on the nippy side. Friends visiting tomorrow, which is always great. And perhaps since the wood didn't come as scheduled (grr), we can finish the raised bed and put in our garlic finally.

I've the beautiful fire on, about to pour a glass of wine, then once D gets home from town we'll tidy and relax. Truly is a beautiful life here and daily (more often, several times a day) I make sure to take a moment to appreciate something about it, and thank the universe for letting it all come together the way it did. Because after all of my silly worries and irritations, at the end of the day... I'm so thankful and happy to be here.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

nature

Around 7am, a beautiful coyote WOLF paused on the side of the hill beside our house, not far from where I stood on the porch, trying to figure out what the dog was barking at. So majestic, magical... it stared awhile then ran to the tree line and eventually into the woods.

After voting Tuesday night, driving down our road, two big slow beavers slid across the road from the marsh. So cute and so fat.

And last week, coming home from Toronto, a bear! Looking like a night-time shadow beside the car, then moving in front and running ahead of me along the road till dipping back into the dark on the other side... only a short ways from our driveway. Sprinted to the front door to tell D.

Not to mention hundreds and hundreds of Canadian Geese, who's squawks echo and echo. Oh, and deer.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

new addition

It's been awhile - hope you're all well.

Kawarthas are just gorgeous this time of year, my favorite time, autumn. Leaves just starting to fade, but were in top form over this past Thanksgiving weekend. Whisk and I drove up to visit my folks in Killaloe... beautiful drive and amazing weather. Always nice to see family. My dad's building a house for my brother, and my uncle's building a house too. Exciting things going on.

We've also adopted a new little muffin. Our neighbour came over the other night with news that someone had dumped a cat (drove up, opened car door, closed car door, drove away, then meowing...) at the bottom of his driveway, and since we just lost Raja, would we like this one? He wasn't able to take it in. Can't just leave a cat meowing outside so of course we did. Monday night we brought over a cat carrier, a bowl of food, and a couple bottles of beer and kept watch, eventually trapping the skittish little dude. We're wondering if it was abused - seems healthy physically but quite afraid of getting close. Settling in now, warming to us. So - introducing... nameless, gender-unknown cat!

Ain't she/he cute? Will take it to the vet soon and get all the details.

Whiskey's outside gnawing on a soup bone - dad's suggestion, genius idea. Asked the meat counter at the grocery store for any dog bones and now he'll be happily busy for awhile (just read that I should take it away after a half hour or so).

Oh man, am becoming a woman who talks about pretty leaves, nice weather, and pets. Maybe not a bad thing.

Monday, October 06, 2008

missing raj

Been sort of a morose few days. Our cat is gone, out of the blue, disappeared. I think the hydro people (who were cutting down trees along the road and in our driveway) might have scared her off? But if so, strange she's not back yet as that was Thursday morning. I've walked our country road up and down several times and no cat, so then maybe... coyotes got her? Horrible thought, but reality in this area. Anyway, must admit, have let a sad cloud sit over me, meaning there is less joy in the house, which is not good or fair.

So, looking forward. In time we'll get a kitten, but Raja was truly a tops little buddy and she will be... impossible to replace and thus greatly missed. It's wild how attached you can get to a pet. It's been a decade since I've had one (two!) and the heart-brokenness I feel surprises me. Am sort of taking it as a lesson in things to come when we acquire more pets... and children! Not that I'm predicting a future of profound loss and darkness, but just a reality-check in terms of realising what you can and can't control.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

autumn

A week of grey skies and wetness but at a home like this, living with my love and pets in the country, it's a time to keep warm and cozy... and prepare for winter. Saturday morning drives, big grocery shops, visits from friends. Red wine, zucchini casserole, dark chocolate. Big sweaters, warm socks, scarves. Sitting by the fire after dinner, playing guitar, snuggling. Insulating crawl space, piling wood, servicing snowblower. Snow tires, a hole for ashes, garlic. Vases of purple asters, crisp clean air, tea.

Also: bears!

Monday, September 22, 2008

whiskey!

Better photos to come, but check it out y'all!! We got ourselves a sweet little buddy over the weekend. A 3 year old yellow lab (tho we think he might be younger) from an ad in the paper. He's lovely... knows how to sit, lie down, shake a paw, come, etc. Doesn't jump up or bark too much. Likes soccer and fetch. We've been keeping him tied (one rope off the porch and one in the field under a tree) with frequent walks around the perimeter of the fields to get him used to his new home. Tho today I let him off just to see how it would go... he was great! So am hopeful he'll eventually be a well behaved off-leash farm dawg!

Friday, September 19, 2008

evolving

The mornings have grown chilly. New windows aren't in yet, not till mid-October, so cracks and rotted frames have inspired blankets, sweaters, and the odd touch of thermostat on the baseboard heaters (haven't received a hydro bill yet so the electricity fee has yet to scare us). We have a bit of hardwood piled, leftover from the previous owner, and some kindling from L&J, so if it gets colder we're okay. It's really not THAT cold, we're just still adapting, coming off the thoughtlessness of landlord-funded heating, and the insulation of Toronto's vast city-ness. We've agreed on investing in some wicked slippers and house-coats and maybe a bear skin rug by the fire... naw.

D ended up working today, so I'm left trying to puzzle out if I should keep the noon appointment I've made to go see a dog...! "Free to a good home" 3yr old yellow lab. He sounds poifect and am a little worried another family is gonna snatch him up, so maybe I should go for it solo.

Other than that, till up a bed for the garlic (4' x 12' ish). We ordered 5 pounds of Music and 2 pounds of German Red to get us started. This initial making of the bed will be hard work as our fields are full of ROCKS. Then later tonight, we'll drop in on the neighbours, beers in tow, and have a night.

p.s. Capital Letters!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

response ability

at times, a small pang of anxiety and fear. home ownership. responsibilities never-ending, stretching widely into the future. spending money. keeping warm and safe. feeling happy and comfortable. anticipating a future here, with children, pets, and gardens. will all be well?

is the well water ok? will the septic tank last? will the car start in -35C weather? will the crops grow? will the canned goods keep? is help nearby? are the sheep warm? is the wood dry? are the trees going to fall? is my back going to last? will our friends visit? is this what life is now? and so on...

lying awake last night, d says quietly: we have all the time in the world my love, and all we're doing is making things better.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

streets

just got back to the office, up several stories, up off the streets filled with people of all ages, all directions. noise, colours, movement now inspire not panic but confusion. distracted from my own thoughts, self, direction and often taking moments to collect and breathe, in a funny way, where i smile at my lack of flow here. like a little old lady, smiling in puzzlement, lost but in an okay way. settled by the idea of home, soon enough.

Friday, September 12, 2008

till your soil

the mantis mini rototiller - a little gem bought off the previous house owner. after a few pulls and fussing, it was good to go and plowed up a front garden in a jiffy. came away with jiggly arms and a new appreciation for powered tools. a little weed-wacking that afternoon sealed the deal. till (ha ha) now, have never really used such tools (as a grown up, doing things i want - lawn-mowing as a kid was a drag) and am quite pleased with how it can make yard work zoom. i know this is a very 'duhhh' statement but... it's just that i get it now!

purpose of this garden (aside from... gardening) will be to hide the cars a little and also inspire a happy 'i'm home' sigh when coming up the driveway. after wading through a zillion gardening photographs online in my time, have recognized that i'm a "cottage garden" type which is good because it should jive with our life & land. this little spot will have rudbeckia, echinacea, obedient plant, catmint... odds and ends basically, but tall, carefree and colourful.
oh man, the yard has a long way to go! but baby steps... will be fun.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

getting cozy

came home from a few days in the city to my love and our cat. lit the fireplace to get rid of the new autumn chill (and give the new insert a spin - works great). snuggled up and chatted. coming home never felt so good.

Friday, September 05, 2008

friday

it is with usual eager anticipation that i'm counting the afternoon hours till work is over and the weekend is here. seems like the first one in awhile where i'll get to be totally at home. which is actually sort of strange to anticipate as i'm -always- home, telecommuting into work. but tomorrow will be uninterrupted, guilt-free time in the garden, reading, relaxing, and doing small chores. will be solo too, as d is visiting his folks this weekend. sunday am off to the city for a few days... city visits lately being a very chill time spent feeling overwhelmed, if that make any sense.

the weather today is strange: wind wind wind (the chimes are rockin' on the porch - considering taking them down for a break as i'm getting chimed out). just waiting for the rain that doesn't seem to want to fall.

have been getting up with d all week ~6am. waking with a surprise amount of energy and vigor for life, happiness, not to mention extra hours in the day. this morning (after letting a skunk pass by) i was pulling cedar logs around at 7am in my nightgown. putting them along the end of the driveway to try and mark a separation between drive and yard. right now it's all blendy.

4 more hours!

Thursday, September 04, 2008

fall gardening

in a last ditch effort to get beautiful-ness happening in the yard, i've ordered some seeds from richter's for fall planting, with hopes that the springtime will yield more flowers and garden-y-ness with minimal effort.

some perennial flowers:
black-eyed susan (love)
catnip (wind her up and watch her go)
sage, russian (tall and purpley - my compromise for lavender which wouldn't be happy up here)
pansy (hardy to 6 - might wait till spring as we're 4b tho it's all an experiment right?)
tansy
yarrow, white (both bring happy bees and things to the garden i think)
lamb’s ear, woolly (soft)

also, for kicks:
daikon (d's choice)
lemongrass, indian (indoor cooking)
rosemary (ditto - maybe gifts?)

okay that's one distraction gone... time to work!

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

brain-storming

a campfire, a swim, a paddle-boat ride, a sunburn, a magazine or two, a visit with family, a big meal = a restoring, relaxing weekend in killaloe, staying at the cottage. benny's sale yielded a cheap, great pair of sorels (winter-prep in back of mind). returned with farm eggs, garden cucumbers, and a new bunch of ideas on how to pursue the upcoming year of our new farm-life. dreams so far. we shall see what happens.

despite heaping debt, can't help but ogle all of the beautiful bulb choices this fall, especially with the idea of a naturalized drift of mixed daffodils... or forced paperwhite narcissus. wonder how one finds deals on bulbs. might have to wait as we'll be spending a little extra dough on garlic seed!

tons of house flies getting in these past few days. ick.

Friday, August 29, 2008

cedar land

walking the fields and forest, i think about the concept of ownership. this is my land, these are my trees, these cedars, some of them hundreds of years old, most of them at least much much older than i - i bought them. as factual as this statement may be, i have trouble comprehending it. regardless of any deed, this land is a host to me and my relatively brief stay here. i want to treat it well and live in harmony with it's peace, beauty, and wisdom, convinced that if the land is happy, we'll be happy too.

in this vein, i've been weighing the thought of getting some logs cut. my pops is adamantly against any sort of cutting, stating "the value of the land is in the bush itself" and uncut forest is more valuable. but i think that his fear is immersed in images of a clear-cut wasteland. there are arborists that do selective cutting and this could in fact make a forest healthier, allowing trees to get bigger with the additional space. it is also possible to experiment this theory on a small piece of land as we have probably 55 acres of it (the seller had said 45 acres of bush and 20 acres of field but the field is definitely not that large - perhaps 10). there is also an access road along the north side, so we could potentially send loggers to the far edges where we wouldn't see any of the results. the money we could get from the larger logs would help ease a small part of our debt too.

but is this right?

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

a new mindset

a very slow gear is starting to move inside: to think like a farmer!

d and i hit the lindsay farmer's market last saturday where i had the pleasure of meeting two of my internet blog buddies in sort of a strange cosmic fashion. tiny farm mike (who i've been reading for a couple of years!) and cameron ryan were discussing farm tours in the area, perhaps including a visit here, just as i was loading up on tiny farm produce before saying hi. animated garlic and tractor talk on top of lynn handing over big bags of green beans, lettuce, and basil sort of sparked a more 'real' realisation that i can, should, and will be a farmer too one day... one day... soon! from dreaming about such stuff while police sirens zipped by my bathurst street window to gazing over a field of singing crickets... it makes me feel like one of the luckiest girls alive.

it's late summer and house-fixin' has been our priority (gotta get ready for winter - is it really almost september?!), but the garlic possibilities are calling, best seeded in the fall. all of sudden, things on my list include: walk/photograph the fields, check the pile of boards for raised-bed construction use, read up on garlic planting tips, order seed (how much? what kind? what for?), get a pile of chicken manure from the neighbours (the rooster crows are a dead giveaway - must introduce myself!), till, draw up plans, figure out irrigation, and so on. farmer stuff! how strange and great.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

home & hearth

guests have come and gone leaving our home feeling enriched and happy. with memories, with campfire smoke and flute/guitar jams, with mom's peach jam, with stories and laughter, with loads of pressed coffee, with reno recommendations, with cobs of fresh farm corn, with bro's vehicle expertise, and with walks through the field and forest. above all, sharing. just having this place and having people we are so happy to have in our lives come stay and enjoy/appreciate with us. all are welcome.

it's quiet now, back to me and the cat during the day. am still in my pj's working in front of the compooter...

gave the new fireplace a go last night - it's sort of a joy. interesting and a little scary that we will be relying completely on this thing for our winter well-being. load of wood (7 cord!) comes in october. next year we'll order in the spring but hopefully it will still be enough time to get it all sorted. we went with ordering cut/split to save time and energy for everything else on the list. the old owners had a garden over the septic which is generally a no no so we'll probably mow it over and build a structure for some of the wood. will probably convert the porch to a wood spot as well... i imagine it could take a few seasons to get the wood schedule/placement in order.

such a beautiful day! but back to work!

Thursday, August 21, 2008

sweet bottoms

i'm at sweet bottoms cafe on market st in fenelon... so chill and nice. working here (coffee, banana bread, free wifi, good tunes!) while the fireplace dudes (jeff martin chimney maintenance) install the new insert and liner at home. he brought his beautiful dog to run around.

might do this more often. sometimes it's nice to get away from home where there are always things to do... can be distracting, even just mentally. tho taking tomorrow off to finish painting before company comes. wheeee!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

friends

constant cricket song, happy pet sighs, bird twitters and tweets, bug bumps against the windows, rooster crows.

elvis doesn't come by anymore as the neighbours have started to chain him during the day. makes sense tho - as you can see in this photo there's a missing patch of hair on his leg. apparently dogs will lick and chew like this to relieve stress. last time i saw him it'd grown back. less confused about where his home is but we miss him!

Monday, August 18, 2008

no wars, no cars

strange - a beautiful sunny summer's day an hour ago and now rain, gray skies, thunder and lightning! it comes and goes so quickly but makes my position here, desk in front of a large window overlooking the field, an interesting sight. each day i see clouds of every size and skies of every colour. listening to ellen allien, really interesting minimal techno by a german woman. seems to match the crazy beautiful weather.

off to toronto in about 5hrs. wish i could stay. aside from just being in the lovely chilled out country-side, would love to prime/paint the office. we chose a really intense/dramatic golden yellow which will be like sunshine at the end of the hallway.

the house-warming bash we were aiming to have on saturday has been scaled down to a small gathering of friends... maybe 4 or 5. lots of last-minute drop outs but it's summertime and i think people are simply too busy and worn out to make the trip out here. fair enough - i'm sure all will come stay eventually.

and now... sun again!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

merrily we roll along

giving the first morning hour over to plants. i call it "plant time". wake up, wash, dress, eat, then re-pot, prune, water, weed, etc. an hour goes by so fast but it's enough to make me feel more okay about another day in front of my computer screen, working.

having random moments of elation. good sign. just so happy to have this beautiful space and quiet and house and cat and boyfriend... life is good.

a woman from the peterborough green up is coming by at 1pm to give me a free low-down on my well and septic. and tomorrow we'll get an energy audit and hope to qualify for some grant money from the government for the new fireplace insert and windows and whatever else we do! on and on...

Thursday, August 07, 2008

disc drive

looking out the window at my desk, the sky is all shades of blue, a spectrum from white, deep blue, to purple. clouds all over the place and spots of rain too. thunder bubbles up randomly and the crickets are out. it's a beautiful, wet day.

d's working on the basement this week. such a mess. seems to be very excited about hanging his tools. gave the windows guy a deposit this morning so it's an official go. in six to eight weeks, there will be light - all new ones plus the bedroom one a bit bigger! will surely spruce up the place and make things feel more well-kept/functional. props to the line o credit.

driving to whitby go-station in a of couple hours for a of couple days in toronto. make an appearance at the office, hang out w/ some buddies, play a couple rock shows, celebrate d's birthday. it's going to be fun. we'll also hit china-town for special groceries (going to try and sprout/pot up some lemon grass), a couch cover, rotis, bla bla bla. yet despite all the excitement and wonder of the city, am reluctant to leave, even just for a few days, the beauty and peace of our new home and life here.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

beginning

a self-portrait wherein i've seemingly mastered the farm-lady stance, aging me beyond my years. pretending, perhaps, that am already a seasoned field woman, looking across her gardens with a well-earned sigh of happiness, shoulders rounded by thousands of hours bent over plants and frying pans, a worn wardrobe accented by tattered hat and work-socks full of burrs, weathered fingers and sweat on the brow. alas, am just a girl stepping away from her computer briefly to survey the upcoming yard-work that will slowly, someday, make me the gentlewoman i aspire to be...

of special note: thistles and bindweed. the internet tells me the best way to rid your yard of bindweed is... to move. ha! this should be fun - it's eagerly taken over all of the overgrown gardens and apparently the seed is viable for 20 years! tilling is a reported death-sentence and if you want to stay organic (yes), the best way to beat it is militant, constant weeding so... *rubs garden-gloves together* IT'S ON.

also, behold, a fire-pit!

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

moving

it's just so beautiful. i feel like i'm living in a painting. the roofers should be done tomorrow, then d and i are off to meaford friday morning to collect the uhaul and move all our furniture home! for work this week, my imac is balanced on a tray table and i'm sitting in a folding chair. furniture will make the place feel so much more ours, and so much more homey. the back rooms and hallways still need to be painted but it's getting there.

Friday, July 18, 2008

real work

this photo is from a post by gene logsdon on OrganicToBe.org. i don't really read the other writers on it, but gene's articles are always so lovely and helpful. i want to read his book, "the contrary farmer" but canadian amazon doesn't have it so i'm on the look out.

am reconnecting with the spirit of hard work. it's been awhile. i'm a software developer just moved out of the city - the pads of my feet are soft, my back weak and hunched, my nerves a little shaky. but i've been here nearly a week, each day filled with scrubbing, painting, lifting, fixing, and already i can feel my back is straighter, my feet tougher, and my sleeps deeper.

save for last night as there was a massive massive thunderstorm. lightning like i've never seen before and the wickedest cracks of thunder. i was shocked awake in the middle of the night, no love to squeeze for comfort, alone and a little frightened. i felt like a little girl for a minute before remembering my age and situation: a woman in her house in the country, listening to the rain. i had to recall this a few times after each bang of thunder but eventually i slept, smiling, feeling as if i'd made it through some sort of initiation.

ran some errands 'in town' today, list in pocket, car. a couple bottles of wine for the upcoming paint-a-thon and then to homehardware for supplies ("guess what i'm doing?," i say to the cashier. "painting?") and then to the groc for that other kind of fuel, food. the grocery store in fenelon is a mad house. it is a sobeys which means it's expensive and kinda slick and as fenelon is a hotspot cottager's destination, there are rich, slick cottagers everywhere (gee, been here a week and already waxing local!). surprisingly, happily, i run into my real estate agent's husband in the rice-milk aisle. they had dropped by a few days earlier to say hi (neighbours!) and drop of a hibachi house warming gift. we chat and it's nice and i like that i live in fenelon falls. on the way out, i ask the cashier about the insanity and she warns if the packers are out, turn around and come back another time. will do.

am thinking "plover" for the kitchen. or maybe "mercury glass"... beiges.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

ta da

propped amid pillows and blankets, a suprisingly comfortable position on the inflatable bed, finally letting my achey bod rest. feet throbbing, the odd kink letting go as big breaths inspire muscles to relax... ah.

i'm at the farm and it's gorgeous.to own such a beautiful piece of land with a neat house that has so much potential feels surreal. not sure it's completely sunk in yet as d and i are in full on fix-it mode and it's yet to really feel like home. but it's definitely beautiful and comfortable and friendly and charming.

today was a day of painting. i twitch at the excitement of inevitable before/after photo posts. soon, as there's still stuff to do. am googling floor refinishing pics and gee, it's like night and day what a sanding and polish can do. we ripped out all of the carpet in the house (living room, hallway, office, and bedroom) and were pleasantly relieved by the presence of hardwood parquet under all of it. much better!

d's in toronto tonight to play a show, and then working in meaford for the rest of the week so i'm feeling out the 'home alone' vibe. so far so good. it's quiet and i feel friendly with all of the nature surrounding me, even the house flies and mosquitos that have come in (no screen doors! so doors wide open). tho i must admit, it does feel nice to have elvis around. even tho the neighbours are trying hard to convince him of his newly adopted home, he's confused about it and ends up spending most of his time at his old home - our the front porch. we took the cat, raja. she's miss independent but such a sweety when she comes to eat and get a cuddle. never thought of myself as a cat person really but raj is cool.

we're having a good time. between cleaning (the seller's filth was... astounding), trips to town (fenelon's beautiful but bobcaygeon has cheaper groceries), the odd dorky photoshoot (have yet to top d. wearing my new straw hat and posing westernly behind the kitchen's saloon doors), and, well, painting and fixing... there are moments of intense quiet and peacefulness that i haven't felt for awhile. in the city i used to really strive for it - meditation, exercise, big breaths - but here, it just is. i can feel it in the house, in the fields, in the forest. in elvis's bounding jog, in raja's prance, and in the smiles and conversations of everyone around. it's contagious.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

small towns

just a quicky to say i already love fenelon falls. i just called the CIBC there to confirm that taking out a bank draft (down-payment for le farm) would be okay even tho i'm not a specific client with their branch and they don't yet know me. she said as long as i bring ID and maybe a contact name from my regular branch, it shouldn't be a problem. that aside she said, "so you're movin to fenelon eh? that's nice!" with a super warm vibe, calling me "dear" after every sentence. i told her where the farm was and stuff. love it.

a few more days

have made a list of things for the first couple of weeks. as with the empty upstairs apartment we stayed in for a bit last month in toronto, we'll be packing the folding tray tables and my mom's folding chair (still bearing her maiden name in marker). also: the vacuum, mop, buckets, boots, inflatable mattress, paint clothes, kitchen stuff, towels, and so on. it will be a good way to start - a real, explicit beginning. we'll move the rest of our stuff in a couple weeks, after the fixin's.

received an email from the seller this morning (a sincerely lovely chap) saying he's going to leave a bunch of gardening tools (shovel, wheelbarrow, etc) for us. the number of times i've said "score!" throughout this process is really... awesome. not sure i've mentioned yet the last home-visit's discovery: a closet fashioned with florescent lights on each shelf for seedling-growing. score!

it is POURING as i write this - the sky is dark and the air is humid. it's a solid, summer rain. d is painting a house today (more like a mansion). after the carpentry job in toronto told him the cottage contracts up north would be delayed another month, he decided to come back to meaford and find side work until we move to kawarthas, then find something more permanent there. fingers crossed. he just called me to say he's waiting out the storm in his car.

here's a pic of perry chillin on the porch off my office. you can see my 'garden' - many anxiously awaiting a roomier space in the ground. soon babes!

Saturday, July 05, 2008

july

a weekend of leisure. splurged on a 'harrowsmith country life' mag at the meaford pharmacy this morning. "200 things we love about the country" is a feature that can sell me. browsing the list now sells me further.

noticing that "show-stopping annuals" in bold at the top of the cover makes my heart flutter. a sure sign of my aging, and happiness to age, as i approach next year's 30th birthday. gee, i think that's the first time i've written "30th birthday." seeing that big number staring back hurts the head a little. so it goes.

have eaten two cukes so far. alas, while in toronto for two weeks, one of the plants dried out and lost its fruits. this one should feed us well tho.

heading over to fenelon on thursday to meet with the lawyer and sign things and hand over the moola for the farm. a steal! keys on friday then a week off to clean, rip up carpet, paint, garden, etc. all fantastically great things in the context of owning a new home. probably move belongings on the 26th. and onward.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

live to eat

returning from an indulgent feed of the magic that is cora pizza. last night was a queen st. snack of spring rolls and a corona for $15. and all week it's coffee and birthday pecan pie. enjoying rich fast snacks at the office, culinary delights of toronto's many ethnic eateries after work, and feeling so smugly full after each and every meal... but at the same time, recognising that this can only go on for so long! sugary, salty, oily, processed foods make me feel kinda lumpy and gross after awhile and am therefore looking forward to returning home (finally!) to a kitchen that fosters a much slower, cheaper, healthier roster of eats. my palette is craving a bowlful of simple, clean, nutty brown rice with some marinated tofu and steamed veggies. or fresh apple juice and a handful of raw almonds. salads. and cups and cups of herbal tea.

and further still, the farm. where we will drink water straight from the field's deep underground reserves, and feast on garden yields. blend basil pestos and roasted red pepper dips. savor crisp snow peas and juicy red tomatoes grown from seed. bake strawberry breads, and apple cobblers from fruits picked by our own hands. sip on fresh ice teas from the mint-patch alongside the house. just thinking about it makes me feel healthier already!

not to mention bike rides, swimming, and hiking!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

gifts

there will be a time where, perhaps perched in the above, i will be writing with the breeze coming off the fields, scented of wildflowers, duck feathers, and cedar, writing about how beautiful things are.

till then, not writing so much because it is instead days of city life, work, and punk rock. also good things, but busy. enjoying my montreal bagels.

for this year's birthday, my love presented me with lovely gifts of hammocking, like above. a chair AND the traditional sized one for having country naps... ! we're all set.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

representin'

sitting in rotman, the business building at u of t. d drops me off on campus around 7.45am on his way to work and my office doesn't open till a bit later so i've started coming here first. there is strong uni wifi and a comfy chair in the large foyer that smells like coffee. a large digital stock ticker zips numbers by to my right and the sound of high-heeled shoes echos. lots of suits, hair gel. biz people seem to be highly manicured folk. i'm the frump in jeans, black sneakers, and a cardigan sitting happily with a 3yr old laptop beside an old back-pack with a "rockets red glare" patch on the front.

tonight's our first show in a string of shows. should be fun. till then, time to work.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

nice saturday

sauntering barefoot from porch to office to back stoop to front porch to grass to kitchen to office again. plants potted, javascript coded, newspaper readed... it's been one of those quiet, breezy saturdays that you wish would never end. tho i must retract 'quiet' as the neighbours are putting a new roof on their back porch. hammering, sawing, etc. tho it's not really phasing me. i think it would if i knew i wouldn't soon be retreating to a sixty five acre farm where neighbours are few and far... possibly to the point where the buzz of a distant lawnmower might be comforting.

soaking up today as tomorrow will begin a ten day return to the big city. t e n d a y s... eek. tho it should go fast and be fun: dinner w/ shoe mon, practice tues, press mailings wed, show thurs in TO, show fri in oshawa, show sat in montreal, my birthday sunday, and show in TO again monday. -wew- the week is also peppered with dentist and chiro appts as well as long days at the office. so it goes.

another month till we move.

joy of plants

a baby cucumber. it's even bigger than this now, growing exponentially each day. the tomato plants are becoming solid, green beasts despite the limits of container living. there are a couple of happy pepper plants, strawberries, herbs, etc. all from seed! the mini-petunias are cute:

i've never done "container gardening" before now so am happy things are growing well. after closing (early july), a lot of the stuff will go in the ground of the new place. we'll also plant perennials and trees if there's any extra cash. mini tiller will be handy.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

switch

bought a snowblower and a mini-tiller. and night-time reading is an ontario government booklet called "pasture production".

Friday, May 30, 2008

flowers, babies, and loud guitars

a busy evening subway west to runnemede station, above which i picked up a pink impatien and walked, observing manicured gardens while mentally flipping through newly acquired perennial guidebook. hugged two great friends, shared food, and held children! mb a favorite kindred and her children just jewels. a little late for work this morning savoring the peace and joy of a 6mo old and an almost 2yr old trading places on my lap. agreed to come back for a june afternoon shared birthday celebration (me & the little one). i'll be 29!

now morning, back downtown, at the office. my neck hurts from a month's worth of mysterious strain... computer job? at 6pm i'll meet the boys for a short practice and then journey to hamilton for our rock show, promoting the fresh LP. will be totally fun.

my life is crazy and great but really looking forward to quieter times once settled on the farm. our bassist is having a baby in october so the band will be less busy as well. back to work.

p.s. lavender field

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

field of dreams

this will soon be my view, looking south from the house, across pasture. anxious to tend the grasses and flowers, plant things, walk it. dreaming of a field of lavender, garlic planting in the fall, poppies...

Monday, May 26, 2008

aging gracefully

peaceful morning wind through the crack i've opened in the patio door. warm and moist with summer but still holding the threat of cooling, the new uncertainty of spring. hung out with the plants on the back porch most of yesterday. all seem to be enjoying their promotions to larger pots. jp and her friend made a fire pit in the backyard so i was steeped with a soft pine smoke for most of the afternoon while d brought me things like beer and salsa and songs on the guitar. there was also an impromptu pose for a portrait and a little sunburn on the back of my neck.

watching the squirrels chase each other through the branches of the tree at the back. which reminds me, since yesterday, i've become particularly fond of the 'lone pine' series of books they be sellin' at the home hardwares. highly recommended by mama, i bought perennials for ontario and also got tree & shrub gardening for ontario. so soon i will be able to identify more things as well as make choices (out of so many) as to what goes where on the new farm (eeeeeee!!)

closing is july 11th. till then i will be immersed in the pages of window, door & floor brochures collected on my first home depot excursion. it's a whole new world...

Saturday, May 17, 2008

long weekend

a five hour journey highlighted yellow in the map book, spanning 9 pages of shapely roads, taking thursday afternoon till evening. successfully avoiding highways to enjoy the country roads on a sunny spring day. east of orillia, along 45, is particularly beautiful, with seriously scenic ups and downs. i giggle passing norland (officially kawartha lakes) as the tragically hip song "bobcaygeon" plays on the radio. near kinmount, d calls and we talk about nice things as i cruise forward. after a brief lost cell signal, a stop in irondale for a bathroom break and heck, a snickers bar (this week is celebratory after all), the signal fades back and cousin b calls to arrange a catch-up brunch for monday. ring mom and dad to tell them it'll be another hour and a half as bancroft is still about 40km away. all in all, a good trip, and here i am.

after several sun salutations and simultaneous daydreams about yoga teacher training (in lindsay?) and a private practice studio (on the new farm?), i get up to make a salad in preparation for dins with the family. it's been early nights, early mornings, breakfast with eggs from the neighbour's hens, the ottawa citizen, coffee, checking out dad's garden, collecting perennials from a local plant sale & gerber's nursery with mom, and chats with the brothers when they swing by. bought dad two blueberry plants for his birthday (shhh, it's tomorrow. they're hidden behind the maple beside the driveway). apparently, in order to get berries, you need two different kinds for pollination. learn something horticulturally new every day.

these two paragraphs refer to thursday and today respectively. i am skipping friday because friday was insaneeeee! major stress and fright surrounding the big deal but by the end of the day, after a few bottles of beer with pops on the screen porch, i could take a big breath and know all was well. emails, faxes, phone calls, appointments... all such stuff now in order. PHEW!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

to be or not to be

my stomach is in knots!!! the offer is being presented as i type and a decision will be made in a couple of hours hopefully. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.


UPDATE: I GOT IT!!!!

Monday, May 12, 2008

offer

it's been awhile and there is a lot to say. i could pick anything and go on at length: prose, peril, and passion. but for now i just wanted to document the anxiety i'm feeling about an offer i've put in for a 65 acre farm yesterday. it is a great house with lots of potential and such beautiful land with 20 acres of pasture and 45 acres of cedar and pine grove. i could go on but it would not be healthy until i know, tomorrow evening, if it's been accepted. because i am not the only offer - some dude drove by the property sunday and also put in an offer, without even seeing the house! so i'm scared he's a rich developer guy, poised to take my dream away from me. of course, there are always others. must keep my head about me. but my offer is solid, so now it's up to the universe... it is the best i can do.

i've been away from home since thurs morning's bus ride into the city. look forward to the return trip, finally, tomorrow at 8am.

that's it for now friends. must get back to the last hours of office work. there will be more soon, when in quieter times.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

learning

this owning-a-house thing is proving to be a wealth of new information! will start collecting little tips to look back on... i imagine there will come a day where i will reread this history and think "i can't believe i didn't know that!"

-thick paint rollers are better for wood panelling
-weeding takes longer than you'd think
-clothesline tighteners are genius
-keep candles and flash lights in specific places
-incense helps get rid of the smell of previous inhabitants and makes it yours
-listening to the radio makes you feel more involved with the world and less alone
-catnip will make your cat go off the hook
-living rooms are better without a tv
-free provincial long-distance is nice
-crickets are very loud
-door knobs come in different sizes
-black-eyed susans are way too expensive in pots and the seed is cheap
-having sheds is great
-shelves and shelves (vs. boxes and boxes) of books make you want to read
-roofs, windows, chimney inserts, water softeners, and firewood are all expensive but worth it
-a sewing machine can be exciting

Friday, May 02, 2008

the pleasantries of grey

cell phone snap of georgian bay on a grey afternoon. but water, at the right angle, can reflect small amounts of light and so as i looked in, i felt brighter. this was a couple of days ago. the day after, new boots, and a hike with jp and her cousin (and per the dog of course) through the bush. it was full of trilliums and wild leeks. trilliums are our provincial wildflower so it feels proudly canadian to be hiking through a forest of saluting white blooms.

today and yesterday in the city again. it is grey here too and feels more insular than usual, but in a calm way, like the thick air is a blanket. got some stuff from noah's health food store - things tricky or impossible to find up north: vegan cream cheese, rice lasagna noodles, veg patte, jojoba oil, natural deodorant, and so on.

here i shall segue into a little blurb about my adventures in personal hygiene. feel free to skip it. last january i made a resolution to phase out enviro/self harming products full of chemicals - from home cleaning products to face washes and shampoos. a little more pricey, but felt better and greener. still couldn't understand a lot of the ingredients listed tho. then this january i switched to no 'poo (worst name) which is the term folks have been using for not using shampoo or conditioner. my hair was greasy and dull for the first month-ish of detox, but has been noticeably happier since. less oily, more body, less fuss, love it. every other week or so i wash my hair with a sprink of baking soda in water, and rinse with chai tea mixed with a little apple cider vinegar. apparently your head prefers to be acidic so the last step is essential. anyway, as a result of this success, i find myself shying away from a lot of products in general. my moisturizer has been used up so i've switched to plain jojoba oil. coconut oil replaces shaving creme and i think i'll try to concoct my own cleansers, scrubs and such. totally easy and cheap and why i've not thought to do it till now surprises me. think i'm entering a witchy phase of reading about essential oils, mixing herbs and eye of noot in the blender, riding a broom, etc.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

twitter

ps. i joined twitter a few days ago (prefaced with the rationale that i am a hip web developer and have to keep on the up and ups of technology). i like it. we'll see how long that lasts, but for now i've added a little twitter thing to the side of the blog so you can stay 'hyper-connected' to me and know what i'm doing all of the time. creepy and oddly enjoyable.

so far major themes seem to be coding, eating, and looking out the window. sounds about right.

robin

a big fat robin has puffed up it's red breast, i'm guessing as a response to the chill in the air the past few days, and is pruning on the railing of the back porch beside my office. i like that i can sit here and work, glance to my right through the patio door, and see such a small and lovely bit of nature.

i've been writing less here than am willing and able to. might be because i program all day and to spend extra time in front of the computer for non-work stuff has become less attractive. in the city, sitting here gave me peace and calm, a respite from the busy streets. but now that the world outside has become... peaceful and calm, it no longer serves that great purpose and i'm instead a little anxious to finish my hours for the day and do something else. not even anything grand - the dishes, repotting tomato seedlings, petting the dog. i imagine more will come with time like recording songs, writing, making little films... tho darn, those are all in front of the computer too!

the robin flew away for awhile, mid-post, but now he's back, puffing and pruning. i want to name him. is big red too unoriginal?

Monday, April 28, 2008

blogs i like

gillian over at hit pay dirt was sweet enough to give me a giant E image award for excellent blog. so nice. i think it's one of those pass-it-on things so i'd like to note, other than gill, i love reading mike's tiny farm blog, milla's hilarious country lite, and elizabeth's pensive welsh hills again (and perez hilton but let's leave that one out). i'd also like to link to my girl jp, over at vine in a cold climate. d & i live here with her & her black lab in her beautiful house. she brought me coffee this morning.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

postpone

programming so much it tires me
tired so much it makes me stay
home with movies and tea
but muscles are aching to leave

a run, a walk, a bike ride
anything for a heart beat and sweat
soon, till then
the odd back porch visit

Thursday, April 17, 2008

city girl

on the green side of the drive it is open windows and laughter. but once things close up on the road, so does my chest. like a scared dog i gnash teeth and claw, the grey skies clouding my vision and awareness, negativity leaking into my blood where once there was fresh oxygen. finally, avoiding death, we park, but the aftermath of vehicular stress is already deep in my marrow.

shaking on the streets, there is luckily refuge above, twelve stories, in the home of a friend who is away. i storm there, growling at anyone who looks at me, especially the men and the crazies. for i am crazy myself with anger toward the existence of such a place.

then, a knapsack off my back, a big breath, a quiet room.

and the realisation that in only two short weeks i've transformed back into a country mouse, further proof that most likely i always was, despite a decade of trying otherwise.

in trinity bellwoods park, my love, now reconciled, reminds me i live away from here and that this is only a visit. with a kiss, a roti, and a rock show i'm relatively revived. by morning, again willing and walking the streets. early morning streetcar, knee socks, muffin from the cafe... it ain't so bad.

and by mid afternoon, returning from a quick and easy jaw appointment (TMJ gone), sashaying, wanting to sing aloud. for i am young, free, and visiting a great and beautiful city! expensive meals, pleasantries with strangers, heck, a massage appointment for friday at a shmancy yorkville spa (insurance covered of course). this is good, yeah, this is alright.

Monday, April 14, 2008

monday

thoughtlessly packed away the charger for my digital camera. will have to go digging in all the basement's boxes. small black cord... that should be easy to find. :|

this is the current view from my desk. :)

Saturday, April 12, 2008

settling in

been meaning to write more but've been distracted by the tangible. tho life is slower here, it always feels like there is something to do and the time goes by quickly. in the city it was like shifting gears, always on the go or recovering from being on the go, but here it is an easy and constant pace... a tempo i think i'm most happy at. also enjoying spending time with d and roommates. living with my love is a healthy switch as i'm confronted with smoothing over my rough spots (idiosyncrasies blindly developed while living alone). i laugh, learn, and love daily... it's so nice i can hardly recall why i was so attached to living solo.

highlights of today include buying terracotta and cool little pots from the dollar store and baking some vegan chocolate chip cookies. gearing down. exhibits a and b:



notice am becoming person who snaps pics solely for blog purposes. getting the swing of this.

started michael pollan's "in defense of food" and although i'm only just into chapter two, it's already got me pausing mid-grocery-store-isle, product in hand, thinking. more on this later.

although i mostly do the vegan thing, have been perking ears to the fishermen (usually /fisherwomen too but have yet to see one) of the area. they're everywhere, settled along the shores of georgian bay. on a walk past the harbour last evening, i quizzed a resident fisherperson on the whats and hows (to which i received a "yr not from around here, are ya?"). rainbow trout, bait on a hook. this morning i asked jp's friend for more detail and apparently fish eggs in a sack, sunk with styrofoam is a popular bait. huh! interesting.

i guess dad put rods in our hands as soon as we were able to hold things so fishing warms me like any proud, happy, recurring, life-evolving childhood staple would. plus i'll admit an attraction to the primitive, connecting with nature, catching food from the wild thing. took a small bite of d's salmon the other night. hm, not sure yet. i sort of remember how to clean a fish. and that trip with uncle h and my bro deep in algonquin, along the robatai river... spinners, frying pan, butter.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

revisit

wandered queen st. with different eyes. sites that would've once made me flinch or scowl are now "interesting" as i can leave it, not live with it. that sounds negative but what i really want to say is the city is beautiful that way.

met my lovely friend o outside the practice space, so we made dinner plans, and after dinner, returned back to the space to hear what he's been up to. violin and loop pedals and 5 amps. greatness.

this photo is from my last night out as a resident torontonian, with friends.

Friday, April 04, 2008